I love this game

You know that Guiness commercial where they guys run down the stairs for St. Patrick's Day like it's Christmas? That's sort of what the NBA draft is like for me and my brother. (Last year I even took the day off. Boss: "Oh, you're off tomorrow. Going on vacation?" Me: "No, it's the NBA draft tonight." Boss: "I don't understand.") This was our first year watching it apart (that was one of my "Cons" when deciding whether to move, right below no Wawa or Ritas [except there's a Rita's opening soon in NE!]) so we planned to have a teleconference and expected a lot of excitement this year in particular because the BET awards were also on. Unfortunately, the night didn't live up to expectations. BET lost out quickly because their commercials were timed to coincide exactly with ESPN's. The only part of the show we saw was Destiny's Child's disturbingly confusing performance that involved their "I'm gonna cook you dinner" song, going into to audience to get Magic Johnson, Nelly, and some actor, and bringing them all on stage to give them awkward lap dances. How did Jigga not only allow this, but allow Beyonce to get the actor who looked like he was going to attack her rather than Magic or Nelly who just kept laughing? (As a side note, can anyone argue that Jay-z is not the coolest person in the world right now?)

As for the draft, basketball-wise it was pretty good. A lot of talent, unlike other years where everyone was unknown after the 3rd pick. I don't particularly like Bogut (just rubs me the wrong way) but that was a respectable 1st. I think Boston totally won the draft by bascially stealing Gerald Green and then making some good 2nd round picks. The Sixers blew it. Granted they didn't pick until 45 but there were plenty of people left who could have been more useful than a poor man's Iverson out of high school. Maybe they wanted to get a hs'er before the new rules went into effect. Entertainment-wise I was a little disappointed. Of course, last year was especially great with the Sixers having the 9th pick and the suspense of Jameer staying in the Green Room until 20, long enough for ESPN to start running the "look who's still in the green room!" montages. But it's almost like everyone this year realized that the draft is a show and they took care to not wear ridiculous suits or bring all their children and baby's mamas to the green room. Nevertheless, here are my favorite high and low points of the night.

Lowlights:

• Espn's coverage: I'm partial to the devil-may-care attitude of the TNT crew, but even so, ESPN just had a little too much going on. I'm surprised there was even room for Mike Turico's head on the screen with all the scrolls and pop ups. I thought I was going to have a seizure. I'm mean it's great to know that Raymond Felton writes poetry in his spare time and Chris Paul likes to bowl (I'm sure those are their actual hobbies too, especially considering Paul's low blow to Julius Hodge this season and his story about defending himself from his brother with a knife), but do we really need to know the history of every 3rd pick ever and stats for the next 10 teams picking, all at the same time?
• Fran Vasquez's translator: I think I can speak better Spanish that Fran and his translator combined. The only words they said were "importante, differente, and cinco."
• No good draft night trades: It's always the best when someone gets picked and has to put on like the Spurs' hat, all the while knowing their rights have already been traded to Toronto.
• No hideous ensembles: Ironically, Chris Paul came close with his brown stripes, after promising ESPN he wouldn't be a draft night fashion joke.
• Sean May's picture: Is he using the same one he used in the tournament? He needs to put the sandwiches down for a minute and take a picture where he doesn't look constipated.

Draft fun facts:

Did you know there are 10 Williams in the NBA? That's the most of one name in any sport.

Did you know that Salim Stoudamire is such a pain in the ass that Andre Iguodala reportedly left early to get away from him?

Highlights:

• Martell Webster's grandmother's hat: The hat in itself wins the best dressed award.
• Stephen A. Smith: You either love him or hate him. Personally, if I could have him and the TNT gang do analysis for all the events in my life, I'd be a happy girl. I thought his head was literally going to explode when Toronto took Villanueva. (I'm sure the heads of several Toronto fans actually did explode with that one.)
• The awkwardness of the commentators also being the announcers at MSG: It's not bad enough being stuck in the green room, but then you have to hear Greg Anthony talk about your weaknesses while you wait. Or worse, if you're someone like Villanueva, you're walking up to the podium thinking someone's going to have a heart attack from yelling so much about you being an awful pick.
• Julius Hodge: I like him. He wore a good suit, too. Flashy enough that you knew a regular person could never wear it, but he looked good. I like Marvin Williams too.
• The absolute highlight of the night: Rashad McCants took so long to walk up to the stage that David Stern was already back at the podium by the time he got there. He had to tap Stern on the shoulder so he'd turn around and pose for the handshake picture. Classic.

Only 364 days until Draft Night 2006...